Saturday, February 14, 2009

It started out like any other day...


I know I'm not the best blogger but, I've been needing to put my heart out there. It's crazy how your life can be perfect one day and then fall apart the next. It started out like any other day, it was Feb 4, 2009.. I woke up at 7a.m. not really wanting to go to work but knew I had to. I get to work at 9a.m... 9:30a.m. I talked to my managers, it didn't go well, I was a complete mess at about 10 a.m. I'm crying and calling my mama to come meet me outside (my mama and I work together). 10:30a.m. Mama tells me it's gonna be alright. Then proceeds to tell me that she has an MRI that day. So, at 12p.m. I decide to go with her. Right after she was done and came out of the office she didn't look good and she was so dizzy. 2:30p.m. I'm driving behind her to make sure she gets home safe. 3p.m I go to Walmart to get stuff for tuna sandwiches. As I worked in the house at 3:30p.m. the phone rings... it's the doctor calling for mama.I run and give the phone to my mama...I go to the kitchen where my sister T is standing.. 3:35p.m. mama comes running out of her room screaming "THEY CALLED SO FAST, THEY CALLED SO FAST!".. T tries to comfort her.. 3:45p.m. Dad is on his way home to take mama to the doctor to find out the results. Meanwhile, T tells me she thinks mama has a brain tumor.. I couldn't believe it so I waited. In my head, I didn't want to go there.. I didn't want this to be. So, as papa took mama to the results, T, Wesley, and I waited patiently at home for another phone call. It's crazy how one phone call can completely alter your life. 4:29p.m. Mama calls.. "I have a brain tumor". For some reason it didn't hit me until I got home in Phoenix. Why my mama? Huh? Why? I wouldn't let myself believe it until I knew more.


Thursday, Feb 5,2009 was a pretty normal day. Spent it with my dear Auntie Liz.


Friday, Feb 6, 2009 I woke up texting T. It went something like this.

T: Are you going to work today?
Me: Gonna try to.
T: Ya.
Me:We'll see how long I last.
T: Good luck.
Me: Thanks what do you have planned today?
T: Not much, maybe some thrifting.
Me: Well if I end up leaving early I'll call you.

(5Mintues go by)

My phone goes off, it's T, "Brit you're not going to work today... Mom just fell." My response,"what! ok ok I'm on my way!!!" In that very moment it hit me. My mama is sick. I drop and scream. I was a mess. I went upstairs and got Aunt Liz to drive me to the hospital.

My mind was racing, my heart pounding out of my chest.No no no no no no no no. You're not taking my mama away from me!

When my Aunt Liz and I got to the hospital, we couldn't find her in the ER. I was in a panic! Almost yelling to the nurses I said "WHERE IS MY MOM." Finally, one of the nurses said, "is that her on the screen?" I replied, "No, but that is my dad. Where is that at?". They had just gotten there. I ran to them.

I can't even describe what my mama looked like. I am scarred. I thought she was gonna leave us that day. And I'm sure T would agree with me.

To kind of go off the story I wanna explain that my mama and I haven't always had the best relationship. I was a very mean teen.

So, as we waited for a room I hugged my mama and told her I was sorry for everything. I am sorry mama for not showing you how much I love you. She replied softly, "Brit, I have already forgiven you. It's time for you to get on your knees and repent to your heavenly father."

My Mother taught me that day, don't sweat the small stuff. Love your life. Enjoy it with the people who really love you.

It makes me sad that something so tragic has to happen to open up your eyes.

We were at Banner Baywood for 6 hours that day before they sent my mama home. I'm sorry but I hate that hospital. They did nothing for her.

Later that Friday night, my dad took her to St. Joseph's where they took really good care of her.

All of my brothers and sisters came to be by her side.

Her surgery is scheduled for Tuesday Feb. 17th, 2009.
I pray that she makes it through the surgery.

Mama you truly are my ray of sunshine. I love you.

6 comments:

Eliza said...

Wow Brit, you are really well spoken. You should blog more. We all love our mother so much, try not to beat yourself up over the past and just make the present matter. Mom loves you, we all love you. Take care of mom and yourself for me. Love you.

Tara said...

Yea!!! A blog post even if it is a sad one. Look who turned out to be well written, that's right little sis it's you. I bet it felt good to get that out. It did for me. It has been an emotional two weeks that is for sure. But, at least we have each other to go through the rough times with. I'm always here for you, love you!

julz said...

Brit thanks for sharing you concern and fears. I love you much and I hope things go well tuesday. KEEP BLOGGING

Grandmommy Crum said...

Hi Brit, my girls have been talking, saying you you have a blog now! I love it, the same goes for me, if you want to be connected with family, there's no better way then to blog! I feel really good about your Mom, I know she is a fighter and a woman of great faith!! I love you so much, I hope you know that! Our prayers will make a difference! See ya monday night!

Michelle said...

Hey Girl, sorry it has taken me forever to comment. Sometimes if a post makes me sad I don't feel like i can't comment. Thanks for sharing your whole side of the story I liked hearing it, I am glad that you were able to be there for her. I can't even imagine what it must have been like to see her in the hospital looking so bad. We have the best Mom in the whole world. I think that is why this is so hard. I love you and miss you, give mom a hug and a kiss from me.

Lucille Jarvis said...

hey Brit, from one new blogger to the next. Just know your auntie lu loves you, Brit, you are a deeply sensitive person, your mother loves you so much, I just feel this challenge will give strength and bring the family closer. We are so blessed in many ways. Prayer will get us through this, love you.