Tuesday, September 1, 2009

My Choas

So I guess im not the best at this blogger thing. It's been awhile to say the least, and there have been some drastic changes I have made in my life recently. I feel need to put it out there.

About a month or so ago, I came to the tough decision that the significant other in my life needed to go. That seriously has been one of the hardest thing i have had to do. I was with them for over a year. I know a year. Crazy how time goes by so fast. I realized I was being held back and that I wasnt happy with myself. So, in with the parents i go. Welcome back to Mesa!! It feels good to be home. Its been too long. Im starting to feel safe again. Although, i will be honest im a little scared to be back. I dont want to fight with my parents like i use to. Its my biggest worry to mess up the relationship that we have now. I love it. Im finally feeling like daddy's little girl again... that went away for a long time because of some of my decisions. Agree to disagree is an awesome tool. It helps keep to the peace and the ones you love. I know if your one of my sisters reading this your saying, "oh my gosh brit your not a little girl anymore", And I know this. All im saying is that im starting to feel the love of my father again. Its been years.
I slowly putting the pieces of my life back together. I noticed my last post was about my dreams/goals. What a good reminder!! So... come the new year back to school i go. Im thinking about a degree in art, music, or fashion. What do you think?

I really miss my sisters. They might not know this but I really do look up to them. I need there comfort and there words of wisdom to get me through. Its because of them I am still here standing tall. I know thats deep but its the truth. Everytime I go down they are there picking me up and building my confidence. This new journey i have started for myself is a whole new ballpark. I AM GOING TO SUCCEED. I have failed too much in my life and I dont want to do it again. So, i am going to do WHATEVER it takes to succeed and to reach my goals. I just wish i had my sisters here as my cheerleaders.

This is just a glimpse of whats going on in my choatic life. I want to be better. I want to be someone that people remember for good things, not stupid irresponsible decisions i make. So, if i have hurt you im sorry. I hope you can forgive me. For this is the start of my new begining. Much love from Bdub.